7 predictions for the birth of Baby Sussex

With the birth of Baby Sussex First Edition somewhat imminent now, I’ve decided to jot down a (fairly) short list of items I expect to happen surrounding the arrival — more so that I can look back at it within the next couple of months and marvel about how many of my predictions were accurate. Yes, I do believe Meghan is that predictable.

There’s a lot of speculation about Meghan and her pregnancy at the moment; will it be a boy or a girl? What will they call it? Is she actually pregnant or using a surrogate? When is the divorce announcement? We’re getting fed up now.

So with that, I give you my below list of seven things I expect to happen in regards to Meghan and Harry’s kid.

She’ll give birth at home 
Like I’ve said, I’m still undecided on whether or not she is actually pregnant. Some days I’m convinced she’s not and other days, I think there is a good chance she is. I’m not totally convinced either way. However, I do think a home birth at Frogmore Cottage or in the Cotswolds is likely and this is more in-keeping with the assumption that she is not actually carrying the child herself.
Let’s say she’s not, for example: royal or not, a hospital can’t lie about the details on the delivery of a child; that is why, back in the day, the Home Secretary was required to be present for royal births, especially that of an heir to the throne, to verify that the child had actually, er, come out of the royal mother’s… “Buckingham Palace garden”, as it were.

The Home Secretary having a coronary

This may no longer be required, but it doesn’t mean that a hospital can pretend that Meghan had given birth if she hadn’t, and as the couple are now moving to Windsor, I do think a home birth is likely.
None of the queen’s medical staff will be present 
It was said around the time of her pregnancy announcement that Meghan had already had her twelve-week scan — and then another story emerged that she had apparently “refused” to be seen by the Queen’s medical team.

Let me just start off by saying, I don’t understand why she did this (unless she’s using a surrogate); all pregnant women want the best care possible while expecting, and if you have access to the bloody QUEEN’S medical team, why would you decline this?
In any case, due to this (and IF a surrogate is being used), I don’t think it’s likely any of the Queen’s medical staff will oversee the birth. The Queen’s physician, John Cunningham, was part of the team that delivered William and Kate’s children, so it will be interesting to see if his name comes up this time, or if indeed the medical staff for baby Sussex are named at all – my guess is not. And it will be very telling if they aren’t.

There’ll be an appearance 
Not one to miss a photo opportunity, I’m convinced there’ll be a “post-baby appearance” for Meghan and Sussex Spawn, likely outside Frogmore Cottage if she decides to “deliver” at home, and assuming that’s where they are going to be living by then. Some people are speculating they’ll just release a photo of the three of them, but I doubt it; do we really think Meghan’s going to pass up the chance to have the cameras and world’s media on her while she presents her mealticket to everyone? Doubtful. Anything Kate does, she has to do better.

If the baby is delivered in a hospital, I still reckon they’ll plump for a London one over Windsor (possibly St. Mary’s) for maximum media coverage; let’s be real, unless the kid is hanging out of her and they’re worried the child will make it’s grand entrance in the backseat of four-by-four with royal security looking on, they’ll be able to get to a London hospital fairly quickly. Windsor is not that far away and I’ll be very surprised indeed if there isn’t some kind of appearance for the baby, Lion King-style, a day or so after the birth.

“Here she is, peasants!”

They won’t give the baby a Victorian name
Trying to be as modern as possible, I can’t see Sparkle Markle going for “Albert” or “Mary” when it comes to naming the kid. They may pick something totally unexpected, may name the kid after the Queen (slightly doubtful though) or… the unthinkable… may name the baby Diana if it’s a girl. I’m about 99% sure they will do this if it’s a daughter, just so Meghan can garner further press attention if nothing else. For this reason alone, I’m hoping to God it’s a boy.

I would say that I don’t think William would stand for Markle dragging his mum’s name into all of this, but considering him and Harry look as though they’d rather die than speak to each other these days, I’m sure the Sussexes won’t give a toss and will go ahead and do whatever they please– just like they have been for the last year anyway.
And can you really see Meghan naming it something like “Mary Elizabeth Victoria Henrietta”? I think not.

The child won’t be a Prince or Princess
As it stands, the kid isn’t due to receive an official title, so it isn’t looking likely at this point that it will be an HRH Prince or Princess.
The Queen does meet with her Privy Council quarterly though, with the next one taking place this month (if it hasn’t already) and this is usually where the changes to any titles or letters patent are made. The last meeting before this was in December, two months after the pregnancy announcement, so I feel like if she was going to change it, she would’ve done then, but… unfortunately, there’s still time yet.
However, if not changed, the titles will be “Lady [insert name] Mountbatten-Windsor” for a girl and “Earl of Dumbarton” for a boy, taking Harry’s Scottish designation.

Soz Scotland

The only reason I think the Queen may grant an HRH title is because the child will likely become a Prince or Princess upon Charles’s accession to the throne anyway, so they may decide to cut out the middle man, but… I’m hoping not.
And then there’s the fact that Meghan and Harry apparently “didn’t want their kids growing up in a goldfish bowl” and wanted them to live “privately”, so… here’s your chance. Refuse the titles, get real jobs and stop riding the royal gravy train.

If Meghan is such a feminist, and a large part of that is independence, why does she need her children to have a title to get anywhere in life? Especially if it’s a daughter, she should be able to do that on her own accord, not with the aid of a royal title. Best to say ‘no’ then, if they are offered.

Your Majesty, if by any chance you’re reading this while snaffling your lunchtime sandwich from Sainsbury’s and having a gander at the net to see what people are saying about your family… On behalf of (most of) Great Britain– PLEASE do not give that child a title. You already did us a great disservice by letting Markle marry in, so do Britain one last big favour and do away with the Prince and Princess-hoods for this one. Ta very much, Liz.

There’ll be celebrity godparents
We can all see it coming a mile off; there will be famous godparents. Any idiot can take a guess that the Clooneys, Serena Williams and probably one of the Obamas will be in there somewhere. Meghan won’t be able to help herself; she couldn’t crack Hollywood or get anyone to pay attention to her in the thirty seven years she was on this planet before getting with Harry, so now that people actually give a shit about her because she married a Prince, she’s going to handpick the most famous people possible to godparent this child. I will be very surprised if anyone unheard of or unknown is chosen in the line-up.
Prince Harry will likely select a few regular close friends (my bets are Guy Pelly, Arthur Landon and maybe Thomas Van Straubenzee, who is also godfather to Princess Charlotte of Cambridge) – but on Meghan’s side, we all know who will be picked – all of the above, including that odious Jessica Mulroney who keeps surfacing everywhere like a bad smell.

Let’s be real here, the woman didn’t have any actual regular or childhood friends at her wedding – they were just a load of random celebrities and some of her Suits co-stars – so it’s not looking too likely that a “best friend” of twenty years it going to be picked (as that one doesn’t exist).
Oh, and I’ll bet you every last penny I have that the Cambridges won’t make the cut either. Three guesses why.

“That’s ok hun, I’d rather stick pins up my arse anyway”

Meghan will take the kid everywhere
Once she no longer has a baby bump to superglue her hands to, and in only needing one arm to hang off Harry, what will Meghan possibly do once the child is born? That’s right – trot the baby out at every available opportunity. Do remember that quote about them wanting their child to “live privately” once they start taking the kid everywhere with them, likely strapped to Prince Harry in a Baby Bjorn sling, or hanging off Meghan’s boob as she “normalises breastfeeding in public”. Yikes.

“Yeah, please don’t”

There is of course the tour of the USA/Canada that they are apparently embarking on in the autumn – a great opportunity for Meghan to return to the motherland with Prince and baby, to show off all that she has “achieved” on UK soil, hopefully to masses of adoring crowds (or a rent-a-crowd if nobody gives a shite – whichever).

I don’t know if this tour has been officially confirmed yet, or even approved by the Queen, but I’m sure Meghan will organise it herself and make sure they are on that plane come October, regardless of whoever dares stand in her way. Be prepared to be bombarded with countless pictures of their little ginger tyke and updated every time it sits, stands or takes a dump. Can’t wait.

In short, I do suggest you all take the next few weeks before the sprog arrives to relax and enjoy (a slight) silence while Meghan is on “maternity leave” (from what exactly, I don’t know). See it as a vacation; a calm before the storm. Because once that child is delivered, we are not going to hear about anything for the next two years at the very least, until Meghan gets pregnant again (heaven forbid – I’ll need counselling) or her and Harry’s separation is announced (hopefully). Whichever comes first.

Let’s start praying that the Duchess of Cambridge announces another pregnancy before the year is out, just to take the wind out of Meg’s sails if nothing else. Altogether now….


Why Meghan Markle needs to stay in her lane

Over the last few months, we’ve seen more and more of Prince Harry’s wife Meghan Markle coming to the forefront, trying to highlight what a “great ambassador” she is for the UK and how “passionately” she feels about feminism and “empowering others”.
First off, I don’t have an issue with women uplifting other women or being proud of their gender; I’m a woman myself and I am proud of that fact also. Sorry men, I do believe we are the superior gender; we go through far more physically and emotionally, and (usually) do it without complaint.With that being said though, I have to say I’m not much of a “feminist” per se; I don’t need another woman telling me how to be proud of the fact I am one– you can rest assured I’ve got that one covered myself and have done most of my life — no assistance needed.

But back on to Meghan; last Friday was International Women’s Day and the palace decided it was a good idea to trot out the Duchess of Sussex to speak on a panel about, well, being a woman, I guess? I, for one, was positively delighted; after nearly 26 years on this earth, I really needed a former-actress-turned-royal to spew out some quotes (she had stolen from elsewhere) in order to feel empowered. Gee, thanks Meghan!

There was a lot wrong with this picture; first of all, Meghan decided to turn up in a dress so short, I could see what she had for breakfast.

Err… ok

I’m all for women expressing themselves through their dress sense, and I get that there’s a bump hitching things up too, but when you’re supposed to be a member of the royal family, there are some things that are best left to the imagination (that means covered up, Meghan– just in case you were confused). How she left the house thinking having her arse barely covered was a good move and one that inspired us all, I don’t know– she must’ve been too busy trying to recruit for all the staff members she’s lost over the last ten months.

Like Meghan does that herself

Flashing aside, the bigger issue was the fact Meghan was asked to join this panel at all. Call me bitter and cynical, but I’d rather not take life advice and be educated on “independence” by a woman who couldn’t break into Hollywood, so had to marry a British prince to gain any shred of notoriety, as she was somewhat incapable of doing this on her own. I’m also massively put off by the fact that she doesn’t seem to have any original ideas of her own, so likes to regurgitate quotes taken from other (actually influential) people in order to seem intelligent. (“I felt the embryonic kick of feminism”):

The whole panel appearance was unnecessary and irritating; Meghan, who appears to enjoy these outings less for what they actually are, and more so that she can be photographed with her hands stapled to her stomach, didn’t really say anything noteworthy at all. She was surrounded by a bunch of women who also didn’t look too thrilled about being preached to by a phoney “princess”– and I was there more for their puzzled expressions every time she spoke rather than anything the Duchess had to say.

“What shit is she chatting now?”

But of course, the panel wasn’t Meghan’s only appearance last week: there was the 50-year investiture of Charles as the Prince of Wales, which took place at Buckingham Palace last Tuesday. The media were excited: “the Fab Four reunited!” the headlines screamed — although The Duchess of Cambridge looked more like she’d rather contract Ebola than stand within a two-mile radius of Meghan. As usual, the “Fab Four” ignored each other and Meghan and Harry were relegated to the background, which simply wouldn’t do for her ladyship.

But fear not; there was the WE Day event at Wembley later that night, where things got even more interesting. Harry, who had been asked to give a speech at the event, took to the stage to do so, eventually having his appearance gatecrashed by Meghan — (“I’m just going to drag my wife onto stage now” announces Harry halfway through, as though Meghan wasn’t waiting in the wings and pissing her pants in excitement at the prospect of being centre stage, especially after being sidelined at the palace earlier in the day.)

“Oh, did you hear? I’m pregnant.”

I’m currently trying to imagine the outrage from Meghan lovers/Kate haters if Catherine had done this with William.

“Shut UP, Kate!”

It has to be said– it was very clear that Meghan was behind the total crap that Harry spewed out onstage. The British don’t talk like that and Prince Harry certainly never used to either — it had “American actress” written all over it.

Secondly, it was the most hypocritical pile of rubbish I’ve ever heard in my life. Prince Harry had the audacity to lecture the public about climate change, made far worse by the fact that the speech was obviously penned by his wife, who recently took a £200,000 private jet to and from New York for a party because she thought she was above flying on a commercial airliner. 

To add insult to injury, Harry then goes on to tell people that they should be free to “express their opinions and views” and not feel that they should have to “hide how they feel” at any point. That’s funny, Harry; because a few people exercised that right in regards to your inappropriate wife, and Kensington Palace exercised the block and report buttons. What you mean to say is, “feel free to state how you feel, but if it’s anything negative toward myself or my wife, you can promptly stick that opinion up your arse”. Such is the mantra of the Sussexes these days.

Meghan, complete with terrible wig and bump-clutching as per, couldn’t resist chiming in and having her moment in the spotlight: “We make a great team. We know we do” she says, throwing her usual faux adoring glances at her brainless Prince, another thing she likes to do a lot when she’s aware the cameras are on her.

First of all darling, who the hell told you that? Since getting married, they haven’t achieved much (if anything at all), apart from spending bucketloads of money and pissing off the public at every turn.

And second of all, what was the need for Meghan to be there anyway? Once again, not content with letting someone else have their moment, Princess Pushy had to shove her way to the forefront and ensure she was seen by the world, while taking yet another opportunity to show that she’s pregnant– and to be a condescending cow whilst doing so.

The crowd, made up largely of screaming teenage fan girls who buy into all that fairytale crap, cheered and applauded. The adults however, who actually pay taxes unlike the teeny-boppers in the audience, were not so impressed. The Daily Mail was flooded with comments such as “who do they think they are?” and “they’ve got a bloody nerve, haven’t they?”– probably not the reaction Harry and Meghan had initially hoped for.

One thing I can tell you, if you’re outside the UK, is that the British don’t like being preached to or patronised. If we won’t tolerate crap from our Prime Minister, we sure as hell won’t accept it from a two-bit American actress whose only claim to fame is marrying a rich white guy.

I’m also perplexed as to why Meghan is writing Harry’s speeches. I understand Harry is not the sharpest tool in the shed, but it seems Meghan has no qualms insinuating that to him directly by basically telling him he’s incapable of penning a few lines and then reciting them in front of people. Quite an insult, coming from your wife. At this stage in the game, it’s quite clear Harry is now simply Meghan’s mouthpiece, as she pushes her strange agendas forward in her campaign to “revolutionise” the royal family. He’s very clearly just her puppet at this point– I’m suprised he doesn’t walk around with Meghan’s hand up his arse.

Blink twice if you’re being held hostage, Harry

In fact, scrap that — I’m surprised any of this is happening at all. The royal family have never been ones to allow members of it to go rogue and push their own ideals out, much to the detriment of the family’s image. A loud-mouthed divorcee from across the pond, preaching to the public about feminism, empowerment and independence? The Queen Mother would be turning in her grave.

“What the shit? Did Wallis die and come back as Meghan Markle? WHO allowed this?!”

I’ve also never been one to particularly enjoy people telling me how and what to think either, least of all from somebody like Meghan Markle. This “do as I say and not as I do” attitude from her and Harry is fast becoming very old; not only is it highly irritating, but it’s also incredibly insulting to the public. Harry telling us to “be kind” to each other while his self-absorbed wife hasn’t bothered visiting the father that had a heart attack nearly a year ago, is quite frankly, utterly laughable.

“Daddy? Oh fuck that old loser.”

So yes, I do feel that Meghan Markle needs to learn her place within the royal family and with that, learn to stay in her lane too. The Duchess of Cambridge manages it beautifully, so why does Meghan struggle with it? It’s not because she’s outspoken, wants to empower women or feels strongly about making a change– to put it plainly, it’s simply because she loves attention and the sound of her own voice.

Any speech she has ever done (and let’s face it, there have been a few) are usually littered with lies and are always somehow turned into a story about Meghan’s life and how she’s Mother Theresa the second. I honestly marvel at her ability to turn a totally random subject into a story about herself — I wonder if she ever put that on her resume? It’s quite a skill.

If Kate stood at a mental health conference to give a speech and managed to turn it into an entry from her diary, we’d all wonder just what the hell she was playing at. So why is Meghan allowed to get away with this? I’ve always said that if she wanted to change the world, she should’ve gone into politics — not married into a family where they expect the wives to dress up, shut up and walk two steps behind their husbands at all times.

Bottom line: I, like many others, am just simply not interested in hearing the ramblings of a former actress. People hailing her for being an “inspiration” just because she opened her legs for a Prince and subsequently snagged the much-sought after ring is really unbelievable. She is no different to the likes of her pal Amal Clooney, Melania Trump or any other woman who married a man for his wealth and riches.

So Meghan, you can lecture me on climate change once you ditch the private jet jollies around the world.

You can tell me to be “kind” to people once you treat your elderly father with a bit more respect, like any child should with their parents.

You can tell me to donate to charities and help the needy once you stop spending £10,000 on one outfit for a half an hour visit to the impoverished.

By all means, find your niche within the royal family and explore it– nobody is objecting to that. But in the process, dress properly, behave like a Duchess and stop trying to outshine the rest of the royals, especially Catherine, the future Queen consort. Realise you don’t need to always be at the forefront of everything or in the spotlight to make a difference.

But the simple fact remains; until you heed your own advice, people won’t be interested in listening to you offer it– and the sooner you accept that, the better.

“Kate Middleton was never bullied” — wasn’t she?

To dive right in, one thing I’ve noticed when clashing with Meghan Markle fans (a daily occurrence) is that one of the first things they like to claim is that “Kate was never bullied like this”. What they mean, of course, is that Kate never received vitriol from the press or public, and that it’s been all sunshine and daises for her over the last sixteen years, and everybody has loved her from the word “go”. Well— not quite.

Being perfectly honest, I’m quite sick of everyone making Meghan out to be this poor little victim and prisoner of her own fame. Before I turn my attention to Kate, I will say this: Meghan is a grown woman of 37-years-old. She knew what she was getting into and has the money and means to protect herself or simply ignore the bad press if she so wishes. She’d do well to use her resources wisely.

Now, onto Kate. Below, I have included some screenshots from Daily Mail articles, stemming back as far as 9-12 years ago. Here, you can see the way she was written about and how the public perceived her; I.e. not well. I don’t need to give much more of an intro for this — let the comments speak for themselves:

Here’s a nice article by Sandra Parsons of the DM, referring to Kate as “boring” (because she dared buy frozen pizza with William one time) and goes on to complain about Kate in this, especially over her lack of job. Funnily enough, this was written on the day William and Kate became engaged in Kenya, on 20th October 2010– the news wouldn’t go to press for another three weeks. Bet Sandra felt like an idiot after that.

She of course goes on to talk about the fact that William STILL hasn’t married Catherine after nine years together, as though it’s her business, and as most journalists did when trying to hit out at the future Duchess, included a picture of Kate at the roller rink, where she had taken a tumble— complete with scathing caption, where we could all guess the catty undertone:

And now, without further ado, let’s hear it from the public:

This echoes of a time when nobody gave a fig if the future king married or not, with others calling her a “royal wag”, bashing her for her lack of job and basically deeming her useless.

Oh, there it is. The famous “they should sod off and get married somewhere quietly” comment, said about the future monarch and Consort. That made me laugh, considering neither of them had ever been married and there was no earthly reason as to why they shouldn’t have had a big wedding. And yes, they were bashed for having a long courtship, where Prince William dared to take the time to see if the woman he loved was up to the task of being Queen one day.

More scathing remarks— do these sound familiar, Meghan lovers? “She’s nothing like Diana”, “she’s nobody’s role model” and “please choose someone else — she’s a social climber!”. But of course, Kate never got any hate right?

More people expressing their delight at William potentially choosing her as his bride. “The woman is a joke, she doesn’t have a job, etc.”

More people hoping William will dump her, as it appears to be “the only correct thing” he’d have done during the relationship.

“She’s not princess material”, “his image is suffering because of her”… and… “let King Henry take over”? Ha! Bet you’ve changed your tune now.

The ‘end of the monarchy’? Where have I heard that before?

“Didn’t he first notice her in a sleazy lingerie show, half-naked?” As opposed to… taking part in numerous sex scenes and simulating blowjobs onscreen? Hm.

None of us were too thrilled about Harry’s subsequent wedding either, and as far as William and Kate’s marriage goes, they’re doing quite well so far, I’d say. Nothing like Diana and Charles.

I think I’ve overloaded this, so I’m going to leave it there for now, but I think you get the point I’m trying to make. These comments that Meghan lovers deem to be so ‘hateful’ toward the Duchess of Sussex are really no different at all to the nasty comments Kate received back in the day. Catherine has put up with MANY years of scrunity from the press and vitriol from the public, but never once tried to control any of the palace’s social media accounts or forced them to police public opinion so that she could be put in a better light. She kept her head held high and got on with it, with an “I’ll show you” attitude.

And she has.

The comments and general public opinion toward Catherine these days are a far cry from what they used to be; she fixed up and buckled down, got behind some decent charities and does a fabulous job of looking and being the part every single time.

Meghan, in comparison, appears weaker and more self-centred. She seems more wrapped up with her own public image than actually conforming and adhering to royal protocol, and I think this will ultimately be her biggest downfall. There is a lack of respect for the crown, the family and what is expected of her in her new role; as long as she has global fame, the cameras in her face and people adoring her, she isn’t concerned about representing the monarchy, and that is where she falls short of the mark. And that is why I don’t think her and Harry’s marriage will last the course.

Kate has fought hard to prove herself over the last eight years that she’s been married to William; Markle has failed to toe the line even once over the last three that she has been involved with Harry. So Meghan lovers, next time you want to band around the term “bully”, as though Meghan is the first person to receive any backlash from the media and public, I’d invite you to look at this. She is NOT the first and will NOT be the last; so my best advice to her is to spend less time trying to doxx people, pull her socks up and get on with it. You chose the life Meghan; now time to see if you’ll sink or swim.

Dear Kensington Palace

Dear Kensington Palace,

Today, you issued a new set of “guidelines” (for all us peasants to follow) in regards to your social media accounts and how we, the public, are expected to behave. I did a quick scan, but didn’t look at it in too much detail as it was largely what I expected — a silencer for anybody who has an opinion.

There are the usual ones — no racist remarks (completely agree and understandable), nothing derogatory, etc. But really, in regards to the other terms, there’s an undertone here — no, world, you don’t get to have your say.

Considering a high number of the people following your twitter account live within the UK and therefore are taxpayers, from which the royal family benefit, why do you have the right to tell us what we can and cannot say if it’s within reason? I understand if there is any discrimination of any kind, then blocking people is acceptable in these circumstances— but you’ve been blocking people for far less.

If someone highlights Meghan’s ludicrous spending habits, why is that a reason to be blocked by you? For saying the truth? Or is that just it — you, Meghan and Harry don’t want to hear the truth. Like a child hiding under their duvet at night from the “monsters”, if you close your eyes hard enough and ignore it, it will go away? Sorry, but not this time.

If people were making actual threats, I could understand the real concern— but I can’t abide by people being silenced for (generally) having a normal opinion. What you mean is: Meghan and Harry don’t like to have a mirror held up to their actions, and therefore anybody who attempts to do this will be struck down by the palace. Let’s be realistic: there haven’t really been any threats toward Meghan. Ok, one or two psychos (who should’ve been sectioned long ago) may have said something, but do they represent every last person following your account? I think the answer to that is no.

And what about myself and my friends? We’ve all received some form of threats at some point or another as well by terrifying Meghan fans. Why is this allowed? I don’t see you, nor anybody else for that matter, rushing to our defence because we were threatened over saying Meghan Markle’s baby bump is a weird shape. Does that warrant someone wishing you ill? Or wishing harm to your family? No, is the answer — just in case you were confused.

Oh, and don’t worry KP; I’ve got a lot to say to the media too, so you’re not just being singled out. Quite a few of us from our group found ourselves on Yahoo Canada over the weekend, in an article (if you could call it that) written by Sarah Rohoman, a woman who likely doesn’t know her head from her backside.

In it, she publishes screenshots of a series of tweets, where some of us question Meghan’s pregnancy. Amongst ourselves. Not including (or bothering) anyone else. Which is apparently illegal these days. Did she ask our permission to post this on a global news outlet? No, she didn’t.

I imagine dear old Sarah didn’t get paid much for this crap — but thanks for getting my name out in Canada 💁🏻‍♀️

Of course, all the screenshots are from the same thread, in posts that were all written within about an hour — it would’ve been too much effort to go much further afield to find anything substantial, so Rohoman stuck to something she could see right in front of her, before going back to chewing her pen, reading the ingredients of her low fat yogurt or whatever else it is journalists do when they pretend they’re working.

So on that note, for the media and for you, Kensington Palace, please do tell me why it is you think it’s important to draw attention to those who voice an opinion on Meghan, but when Meghan’s fans spew bile, threats and other nasty comments toward the rest of us, this isn’t covered by the news? Why is that? Because it doesn’t fit your narrative?

There were people wishing death on Thomas and Samantha Markle— why isn’t anyone saying anything about this? What, because some people perceive them to be a nuisance and the only person to be protected is “holier than thou” Meghan? So what if you disagree with the Markle clan— they don’t deserve to receive threats either. Talk about a double standard.

There are others wishing death on the Cambridges so that Harry and Meghan can become King and Queen (*snort*) or giving the UK a chance to vote William and his children out of the line of succession to pave the way for Ginger and Nutmeg; it would be funny if it weren’t so frustratingly deluded. Also, for those suggesting the above, please note the following:

  1. Wishing death on a man and his three kids doesn’t make you any different to the people you scream “bully” at online, day in and day out. It, in fact, makes you far worse and a raging hypocrite.
  2. Thankfully, the monarchy doesn’t operate based on an election system — and if it did, dear Meghan lovers, you might be shocked to find you still won’t end up with her as Queen Consort.
I wouldn’t take that vote if I were you

And what of the stories about Harry creating a fake twitter account to take a gander at what people are saying about him and Meghan online? Strange behaviour for a royal prince. (Don’t you have a ribbon to be cutting somewhere instead?)

So what was the plan with that one, dear Harry boy? Because it certainly wasn’t to take public advice to fix up you and your wife’s image, as you still behave like two immature 16-year-olds, holding hands and skipping about when meeting dignitaries. What is the purpose of lurking without intent? To rub salt in the wounds when you read you’re not as popular as you initially thought? That a lot of people don’t actually like nor have any respect for your wife? That people are pissed off with the amount of money Mrs Sussex spends? I’m baffled.

And as for you, Kensington Palace, on a closing note; you can try and whitewash your twitter page, the media can post as many inane stories as they wish, but the fact remains— people will not be silenced. Nor should they be.

I understand not tolerating threatening behaviour, but what I do not understand is you blocking and reporting people because they’ve pulled up certain members of the royal family on their behaviour— and why shouldn’t they? The British taxpayer funds the House of Windsor after all, so why is our say not important? Because Meghan and Harry threw their toys out of their pram and demanded you clean the page of all comments, bar the ones licking their arses? Honestly, I wonder what kind of world we’re living in.

Really, Kensington Palace, get a hobby. Surely you should be paying more attention to blocking Meghan’s credit card rather than actual people for having their say? After all, it’s the public paying for you, so if you don’t like it, feel free to remove yourselves from the royal gravy train.


A British taxpayer who won’t miss you 💋 x

Cambridge vs. Sussex: Fashion Wars

There isn’t just a war between Meghan Lovers and Non-Meghan Lovers, but these days, it seems you’re either Team Kate or Team Meghan. In case it needed highlighting, I’m very clearly Team Kate.

Yes, there are some special snowflakes on here, pitchforks at the ready, waiting to spew out their usual bile: “racist”, “bully”, “hateful”, just because you have an opinion that differs to theirs, even their clothing (shockingly). Fact is, I do think Kate just generally make a better royal, especially in the fashion stakes — and here is why:

Let’s be real here, Catherine very rarely gets it wrong. Yes, once or twice, I have wondered if she may have borrowed the Queen’s curtains to wear to a gala or dinner, but she does get it right almost every time. With Meghan, I do feel like most of it is a miss. Most of what she wears either swamps her or is too tight— there’s rarely an inbetween. I understand she’s pregnant at the moment, but I don’t recall the Duchess of Cambridge looking like she’d donned a tent throughout any of her pregnancies.

Designer: Dior

At the risk of sounding like a total arse, this could easily have been bedding rather than a dress and for £99,000 (not sure why this amount was necessary either) the material looks cheap, like she got it off Missguided. I know she’s pregnant, but surely Dior had something better? It’s just not a look. I’m assuming she was trying to copy Kate’s look in Norway from last year (gown— Alexander McQueen), but it fell sort of flat.

My favourite look of Kate’s so far of 2019 absolutely has to be her BAFTA dress — she just looked like a total Queen (designer: Alexander McQueen):

Now THAT’S a princess

Catherine is tall and elegant and built like a mannequin (even after three kids), so most items of clothing tend to look great on her. Meghan isn’t quite as tall, so pulling off long dresses appears to be more of a challenge for her. I must say though, I’ve not disliked everything she has worn, but for the most part, she really doesn’t know how to dress.

Below, I’ve included more of my favourites from Catherine and some of my (least) favourites of Meghan:

Designer: Jenny Packham

This is one of my all-time favourite looks of Kate— she just absolutely nails it. The hair, the make up, the dress, the shoes… ALL of it!

The above photos are from 2012 I believe and she has since reworn it, but only once I think— I do wish she’d wear it again. It’s a real hit for me. 

Designer: Oscar de la Renta

The dress (?) Meghan is wearing is by Oscar de la Renta… and shockingly, despite resembling my grandmother’s curtains, this actually cost £3,000. This is probably the worst outfit I’ve ever seen her in, and that’s saying something, because there are several to choose from. Not only is it a really ugly pattern, but it is also about four sizes too large, like she’s been raiding her mum’s wardrobe to play dress-up. I honestly think it was made for someone a lot taller than she is (5’7” my arse), but you could be Naomi Campbell and not pull this off. A piece of toilet paper also appears to have flown out from a nearby bin and become affixed to her head in the shape of a “hat”, rather sadly. Totally awful get-up – not even a 0/10.

Designer: Alexander McQueen

I love this gown! Lilac isn’t usually a colour I tend to favour, but I love this. The the style of dress is gorgeous and suits Kate’s statuesque figure down to the ground. I believe this was worn in Los Angeles in 2011, not long after her and William married. My only criticism here is that because it was so soon after her wedding, she looked a bit unnaturally thin, but otherwise, stunning as usual.

Designer: Givenchy

So this is from the Endeavour Awards last month; it’s meant to be bespoke Givenchy, but I’m not really sure what’s happening here or what about it is meant to be unique. Meghan looks more like the waitress than the wife of a Prince in a white shirt/black skirt ensemble. I’m not a fan of the rolled up sleeves either; not only does it look messy and informal, but it also creases the arms of the shirt— she kept pulling the skirt up at the back all the way through the night as well, as though she was trying to dislodge a wedgie — not a good look at all.

Designer: Self Portrait

This whole look is stunning — I love it; she wore it to the “A Streetcat Named Bob” premiere in late 2016. My only criticism is that the split goes up just a little too high on the dress, but it works out fine; the dress itself is classy and she also may possibly have the best legs in Britain, so she kind of gets away with it!

Someone actually took the time to design this.. This is almost worse than the floral mess but manages to redeem itself a bit because it actually fits her (sort of). Honestly, this is a travesty. She also appears to have ransacked someone’s Christmas decorations and strung a few pom poms on there too — or are those Harry’s balls? Hard to tell. She also appears to only have one sleeve rolled up, so she looks quite messy. The shoes are the saving grace; I’m a bit fan of wedges and I like these ones — I’d definitely wear them.

I’m not sure who the designer is for this, but I just love it. It’s a simple dress, but Kate looks stunning in it; the split is modest, the colour is great and I LOVE her hair in a ponytail like that. It really suits her — the whole look is 10/10.

Designer: unknown

I honestly am not sure what happened here either. And I shudder at the thought that this actually cost £10,000. The pattern would be pretty for a duvet cover maybe, but not for a dress on a real, live person. It’s too puffy, too busy and looks incredibly itchy; and with the greatest of respect to Meghan, she doesn’t have the legs for dresses either. Also, yet again, she hasn’t looked in the mirror before going out and hasn’t (we don’t think) noticed that the dress is so transparent, we can almost see her underwear— yet again.

I have to be honest, it’s not really the dress that does it here (while I do love it), it’s just the overall look. I’ve always said she looked her best just after she had Prince George, and this picture was taken a few months after his arrival at the Tusk Conversation Awards. Her hair length was gorgeous, she was tanned and healthy looking and being perfectly honest, she looks a lot better a few pounds heavier — it makes her look younger too and she looks fab here.

Well, the Queen must be missing a bedspread from Sandringham somewhere while Meghan wears it for the day. There was one main issue with this dress, besides the fact it’s hideously ugly; it’s too tight for a pregnant woman, making her look rather crass. As thin as Meghan is, the dress was so tight that the skin from her back was spilling over the edge of it. Not a good look for anyone, let alone a royal.

I’m not usually a fan of a lace overlay for dresses, but I do like this one— and I honestly think Kate could wear a bin bag and still look like a supermodel. I stand firm that 2011-2013 were the years she looked the best, and I’ve always been a fan of her hair longer, like here. A stunning look.

Straight up, this look doesn’t suit her at all. The material is cheap and tacky looking, and I feel like it should be more fitted than it is, especially around the forearms. This whole garden party look baffled me; she did genuinely look like a call girl playing dress-up at Ascot for the day — the formal, “prim and proper” look just doesn’t suit her at all, even thought I understand it’s required of her sometimes. I do however like her make up here — but I don’t think hats really suit her and make her appear as though she’s trying too hard. It’s a no from me.

I believe this one was also Alexander McQueen— it was the dress she wore for her wedding reception in 2011, and it is the stuff made of dreams. Once again, carries off the Princess look just perfectly — she is flawless here, and then some. (I’m not sure what Camilla is wearing though).

I’m not sure who designed this (though it was probably Givenchy) and nor do I care to investigate — it really isn’t a good look at all. The top half looks like a swimming costume and the skirt part is questionable at best. She also has a really terrible habit of wearing long skirts and dresses that trail across the ground, especially when the weather is particularly shit, so the underside gets absolutely filthy. The local council should probably consider paying her for sweeping the streets.

Of course— we gotta end with the wedding dresses! I’ve touched on this in a previous blog so don’t want to harp on too much about it, but putting them side by side, there’s only one clear winner.

Just to reiterate, I didn’t find Meghan’s dress to be ugly or anything like that; it was a nice shade of white and maybe the simplicity was intentional. But it was just a tad loose, the veil was wayyyyy too long to the point that it looked ridiculous and her hair was a mess by the end of the ceremony.

Kate’s was fit for a future Queen; elegant, timeless and did a stunning job of mixing the modern with the traditional. I love the lace top half and think the tiara set her face and make up off beautifully. She also held her bouquet properly, and not like she was bringing a jug of Pimms over to the garden table— Meghan seemed to treat hers like it was a hindrance and even carried it like a flag at one point. The doe-eyed Diana look she’s trying to pull in this photo is highly irritating also.

To conclude, I do think Meghan could make improvements if she hired a decent stylist and adviser when it comes to dressing. Sometimes she almost gets it right, but then there’s usually something that lets her down. Spending money like it’s water is bad enough, but when you’re paying £99,000 to look like you’re wearing an Ikea pillow case, something is very, very wrong. She hasn’t been with the family that long and she’s learning, so it remains to be seen, but something tells me she’ll want to do it her way for the foreseeable.

The bullying of Chelsy Davy

So just to dive right in; I recently started following Prince Harry’s ex-girlfriend Chelsy Davy on Instagram, more out of curiosity than anything else– I never had a problem with her and just wanted to see what she was up to these days. Her page is that of a normal 30-something year old woman; she travels a lot, posts pics of her and her mates hanging out and genuinely seems to be a well-rounded individual.

Looking back at some of her older posts around the time Harry and Meghan got married, and even long after, I noticed a string of rude and downright abusive comments from Meghan Markle fans, who even though they like to shout the terms “bullying” and “racism” when it comes to any comments made against their beloved idol, they apparently don’t think the same terms apply when it it said to a woman of white ethnicity.

I did a quick few screengrabs for example, and below, I have posted some of these, just to provide an example of what actual bullying looks like.
Please note: I have not censored out anyone’s usernames or pictures– why should I? They were happy enough to post their verbal abuse without hiding behind an anonymous account, so one can only assume they will be ok with me re-posting these now. They were clearly proud of their opinions at the time, so I’m sure they still are currently. 
After all, didn’t the Daily Mail think it was appropriate to post names and photographs on their site and in newspapers of a few people they deemed to be “bullies” for saying they thought Meghan was unsuitable online? Without their permission, too? If that’s ok, then so is this – what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.

So let’s get stuck in:

This one was interesting to me, because it was literally a photo of Chelsy on holiday, from what I recall. So I’d ask “shi_laws” — where has Chelsy demonstrated in this that she “needs some self respect and morals”? Or Cressida, for that matter? Chelsy and Cressida both have partners, lives and are getting on with things, so why was this comment necessary?

As for the “these girls act so desperate still going to royal events”… umm… Chelsy and Cressida are best friends with Beatrice and Eugenie… so yes… they would attend their mate’s wedding… Do you not go to your friend’s weddings?

And don’t get me started on the other bint below; “just because Chelsy’s blonde and white”. Oh, get over yourselves. At one point, Harry chose Chelsy — and as all you Meghan lovers like to say about Meggers now “she was his choice”— so why does that saying not apply here? Three guesses.

Another somewhat brainless person that has single-handedly written a new British law that we must never say a white woman is pretty, because heaven forbid that is ever the case. Last time I checked as well, Chelsy (in her thirties) did not look older than 70-year-old Camilla, but maybe I need another eye test.

These comments are hilarious, largely because they prove just how deluded people really are. “Meghan has a more beautiful face”— well that’s an opinion honey, it’s not a fact. As for the “Harry didn’t put a ring on her finger” comment; Meghan lovers, look away now, because this may shatter your illusion that Meghan is the only person Harry has ever loved and wanted to be with… Harry did try to marry Chelsy. She put up with intense media scrutiny for seven years and couldn’t handle it anymore and ultimately broke things off with him as she knew it wasn’t the life for her. That’s right— Chelsy was the one who did the dumping and Harry was heartbroken. I still believe to this day that she was the one he has loved the most, but I won’t say it too loud in front of Madame Sussex fans.

Oh, and as a closing remark, the last person that said “it’s been been seven years get over it”— I’d advise you to take your own advice, sweetheart. Coming onto Harry’s ex-girlfriend’s page and hurling abuse years later and after he married another woman indicates that you are really the only one who needs to move on.

The first comment (from someone who has Meghan as their profile pic, so is clearly not “all there” in the head), is really something else. I’ve noticed that her fans keep calling Meghan “beautiful” and “intelligent”, so I will just say the following:

  1. As I said further up in this post, beauty is subjective— not everyone finds Meghan to be this incredible stunning beauty, and I’ll bet 90% of people are saying this just because she’s biracial. In my opinion, take it or leave it, Meghan is very average in the looks department and I’ve seen better looking women in my local supermarket.
  2. What do you deem “successful”? She had a bit-part on an American legal drama and never managed to crack Hollywood in all the years she was out there, largely because she cannot act, so where is the success story here? Chelsy is a qualified lawyer and worked for Allen and Overy for several years— I’d call that intelligent. Because she has a degree? So do lots of women— I graduated with a first from Cambridge— I don’t expect to be at the front of the queue when they hand out the next Nobel Prize.
“I just wanna say thaaaaaanks”

Then there’s the idiot in the last comment saying that Chelsy wanted attention. I looked for evidence of this in Chelsy’s post, but came up with nothing. It was simply a congratulatory post for Eugenie and Jack’s wedding. This was the post:

I’m not seeing it

Here we go, I’ll bet you were waiting for this one; the standard “you mad because Harry married a black woman” comment. They should make t-shirts with this slogan for Meghan fans, as this appears to be their party line for everything.

No, it may come as a shock to you, but most people wouldn’t give a flying one if Meghan Markle was frigging green— as I’ve stressed a million times over:

And people can’t explain why they don’t like Meghan? Have a look at this blog, honey— I got 99 reasons and her skin colour ain’t one!

Nobody is claiming that Chelsy is some world class supermodel. I don’t personally think she’s a stunning beauty either, but a lot has to be said for a woman who was in the public eye for so long and has kept a dignified silence since splitting with Harry— something I suspect Meghan would struggle with if she were to divorce Hazza; let’s be real here, she’d be chatting to Oprah faster than you can say “the Crown Jewels”. It’s Chelsy’s personality that makes her more attractive. She has class— something your Duchess of Sussex doesn’t know the first thing about.

I addressed this in an earlier blog; yes, her expression was unreadable, but yours would be too if a former major love was tying the knot with someone else. Or, y’know, the media took a hundred pics of her sat in the church and only published two where she was pursing her lips or looking distracted, trying to make it look like she was devastated. All jokes aside, I don’t personally think she was; she was with Harry for years, knew what the royal life entailed and didn’t want it. If she had, she would’ve married him. Let that sink in. But of course, Meghan lovers want to believe their own narrative that Harry chucked all former flames aside to marry a black woman, that she triumphed over and above all others in some Game of Thrones style showdown.

Yes, she married Harry, so she’s won the battle— but the war isn’t over yet.

As I stated in my last blog post, Harry was clearly desperate to start a family and so took the first woman who jumped at the chance of wearing a tiara; don’t delude yourself into believing she is the greatest love of his life, because I do feel that was Chelsy. And in any case, they’ve only been married nine months, so the jury is still very much out on their marriage— let’s not get all Romeo and Juliet just yet.

At first, I thought this one was a private joke between friends, until I looked at this idiot’s page and realised Chelsy wasn’t following them and they are utterly racist towards whites— oh, and they misspelt her name.

Just dissecting this, the comment confuses me. “Get out of Africa”— pardon? For those who like to insult Chelsy without having bothered to educate themselves on her at all, Chelsy is Zimbabwe-born, so yes she spends a lot of time in Africa. And in any case, even if she wasn’t, she’s allowed to go anywhere she wants in the world without receiving hate on her Instagram page. Does anyone tell YOU where you can and cannot go? Unless you’re living in an ISIS state, probably not.

I’m going to leave it there for now, as I just wanted to give you a taste of the utter tripe that is posted on Chelsy’s Instagram page— rest assured I could fill another ten blog posts out with the amount of abuse she gets.

One question I will pose to Meghan’s fans who find it necessary to attack Chelsy, Cressida or anyone else who came before Meghan, is this: what is the need? You appear to think the “better woman” won, so why are you going back onto the social media accounts of Harry’s exes and bombarding them with hate? Chelsy hasn’t banged Harry in years (as far as we know) and likely wouldn’t touch him with the Queen’s royal sceptre now, so why don’t you let it go?

Just in case you all needed some further assistance understanding what I’m saying, THIS is textbook bullying. Going on to someone’s personal social media account and hurling abuse directly at them, where they can see and read everything you are saying. Bullying is NOT commenting on the Daily Mail, an open news forum, stating that you think Meghan is unsuitable for Harry and the royal family.

Let’s pretend we’re in alternate universe for a minute, where Harry had married Chelsy, Meghan was the ex (at ease, Sussex Stans— it’s only hypothetical) and people were paying Meghan’s Instagram a visit to tell her exactly what they thought of her… I can only imagine the reaction that would get. Comments made against a biracial woman? Never! Send them to the Tower of London!

So then why is it ok for it to happen to a white woman? When did we become a society where we condoned the vilification of one innocent woman but not another, solely based on colour? When did the definition of bullying vary depending on what ethnicity the person is? Come on Meghan lovers, it’s time to grow up. And if you’re unwilling to do that, you’ll have one hell of a battle on your hands, that’s for sure.

Harry: from Party Prince to Dullard Duke

For years, Prince Harry was most people’s favourite royal; he was young, cheeky and handsome, and much like his grandfather Prince Philip, rarely gave a rat’s arse what other people thought of him. He worked with some amazing charities, served with the army and carried out engagements on behalf of the Queen, both on home soil and abroad.

After William married Catherine Middleton in 2011, there were some concerns for the duo — would they be as close? Would Harry feel left out? What would happen now? But as it turned out, there was no reason to fret; the three of them appeared to be a very close, hard-working trio and Harry said multiple times that he thought of Kate as the “big sister he never had”.
Behind closed doors, the public imagined that Harry was just as much, if not more fun, than his public persona; the tabloids regularly papped him falling out of some nightclub or the other (with some woman or the other), and when he wasn’t doing that, he was sloping over to Will and Kate’s apartment to raid their fridge and be “fun uncle Harry” for George and Charlotte.

These days, we are seeing a very different Prince. Now 34 years old, he married last May and he and his wife are expecting their first child in the Spring. It should be a happy time for anybody – newly married and waiting for the arrival of your baby. So it has come as a shock to many then that Harry mostly appears moody, downcast and distracted these days.

Wasn’t this the life he wanted?

After William married Kate, the press and public speculated that Harry would follow suit soon after, even though there was no special woman on the scene at the time. He had split with longtime love Chelsy Davy about a year before his brother’s royal wedding, and with her flat refusal to live within a gilded cage, it quickly became apparent that this was one royal romance that wasn’t going to be rekindled anytime soon.
Not long after, Harry began a two-year relationship with British actress Cressida Bonas, which promptly came to an end after Cressida realised that two years of sleeping with a Prince had gained her sufficient notoriety to venture out confidently into the world of acting, and so off she went. (Harry sure does like actresses looking to level up, doesn’t he?)

People were starting to feel sorry for Harry; he just wasn’t having much luck in the love department and everyone was starting to see him as the ‘third wheel’ in the Cambridges’ marriage. It was clear he was getting a bit lonely and would have liked someone to share royal life and engagements with so that he could branch out and away from William and Catherine – and this would happen in due course, but unfortunately, not only in a professional sense.

With the announcement of his engagement to Meghan Markle in November 2017, (some of) the public rejoiced; Prince Harry was finally going to settle down, make babies and have somebody to be his partner throughout the tedious royal engagements and boring annual horse parades he has had to endure since he was a kid. Hoorah! (Well, almost.)

What I’m sure the Prince didn’t bank on was a wife who would not only join him on royal engagements, but would also completely take over his share of things as well. Having married an actress, Harry now has to put up with a partner who pushes herself to the forefront of everything (sometimes elbowing others out of the way as she does it) and blatantly demands to be the center of attention at all times. At the moment (God save us all) Markle the Martyr is pregnant, so we are also having to witness daily helpings of her squeezing the life out of her baby bump, as she tries so desperately to command the attention of those around her — all while Harry looks on with a gormless expression, usually appearing as though he has smoked a joint before showing up that day – (maybe Meghan had some left over from her last wedding?)

Even a solo engagement to the England vs. France rugby match earlier this month couldn’t get Hooray-less Henry to raise a smile. I looked at the photos of him first before the final match score and assumed England had lost and the whole team had died, judging by how utterly miserable he looked. But no – England had beaten France. Badly. 44-8. And Harry still looked like he was re-attending his mother’s funeral.

It must also stem from the fact that most of the time now, he does look as though he would be better suited to being a lady-in-waiting for his wife, rather than a royal Duke. Trailing behind her, adjusting her dress when it shifts unpleasantly over her awkward-looking bump and holding her clutch when required, which no doubt contains the testicles he lost some time ago. When he is spoken to, he looks distracted and only manages half a smile most of the time – almost as though he has spotted a UFO in the distance and is trying to work out how to board it and start a new life on another planet, rather than focusing on the matter at hand.

Then there are the rumours that it could be a new diet that has him looking so downcast; it’s been reported that wife Meghan, a dedicated vegan (sometimes, when she feels like it), has her hapless husband following the same dietary regime – (It’s all quinoa and kale smoothies over at Chez Sussex, y’all!). In another shocking article not long ago, it was reported that Meghan has banned Hazza from smoking and drinking alcohol, tea and coffee as well, which I must admit, had me rather baffled – I wasn’t aware there were other beverages to consume besides those, and as Harry was known for enjoying a cigarette, I’ll bet he’s like a viper waiting to strike most of the time these days. I also wasn’t aware Harry was the one who was pregnant and had to give up so much, but maybe there’s something I’m missing.

And what about his relationship with the Cambridges? Well, that seems somewhat dead in the water now too. Harry and William are barely ever in public with each other anymore, and when they are, they don’t make eye contact at all. Harry and Meghan are due to move to Windsor soon and then the split of the offices will happen – with the Cambridges remaining in Kensington and the Sussexes team providing them support as they live out in Frogmore Cottage; a move by the palace that hadn’t even been thought of in the near eight years since the Cambridges married, but is now suddenly on the cards once Meghan has come onto the scene.

I do have to say, the one thing I find to be the saddest is the obvious breakdown between William and Harry. As far as siblings go, they only have each other– and losing their mother at such young ages must have brought them really close together as they muddled through their grief– I can only imagine how devastated Diana would be if she were here today, to see her only two children barely on speaking terms anymore, and moving as far apart from each other as they possibly can within the confines of the crown.

I know, the Meghan Marvellers are ready with their pitchforks: “Harry and William are still as close as ever… Yes, it’s normal to grow apart once you marry…. Catherine and Meghan love each other tonnes” yada, yada, yada. Well, I’m sorry to say that I don’t think any of those statements are even slightly accurate.
If Harry and William were going to grow apart, they likely would’ve done so when Kate and Wills married– they didn’t, because even prior to her marriage, Catherine was well-known in the palace, had a great relationship with Harry and she clearly didn’t see the need to drive a wedge between her husband and brother-in-law. Up until Harry and Meghan married, the Cambridges and Sussexes were amicable in public and seemed to get along okay– it was only after the wedding that things seemed to grow more tense.

Many are arguing that Harry and William are still a-okay, but just leading separate lives now that they are both married with kids; sure– that might be the case, but not one I am inclined believe.
For a trio that were once really close, it seems strange they are hardly ever in public with each other anymore, and do not appear to interact on the rare occasion when they are. For Christmas in 2017, a month after Harry and Meghan’s engagement was announced, things seemed to still be ok; the newly-engaged couple stayed for a few days at Anmer Hall with William, Kate and their kids, which is the Cambridges’ home on the Sandringham Estate. Kate was five months pregnant with Louis at the time, and they all seemed jovial on their walk to church together– nothing about their interactions seemed contrived or put-on.

Cut to Christmas 2018, Meghan’s first as an official member of the family, and the picture is really very different. Rumours of a feud between Kate and Meghan plagued the headlines for months before Christmas, and then it is announced that Harry and Meghan this time were staying in the main house at Sandringham, rather than at Anmer Hall with the Cambridges. I understand Louis had arrived by this time, but he is one small baby and Anmer Hall boasts ten bedrooms, so I doubt it was a case of not being able to find the room to put Harry and his missus up.
The walk to church is very clearly a PR stunt and one designed to convince the public that the “fab four” are indeed just that, despite the frostiness between the Wales brothers and the over-the-top actions from Meghan towards the Duchess of Cambridge, with all her fake laughter and touching Kate’s back at one point as well. Even pantomimes are more convincing than that display was.

Then there is the bigger item to look at: the Cambridges weren’t even meant to be at Sandringham last year. Carole Middleton had let slip during an interview in late November that she was gearing up for Christmas with all three of her children, their partners and the grandkids– George and Charlotte were even going to have their own Christmas trees in their respective rooms to decorate themselves… So this only means one thing: the Cambridges were forced to change their Christmas plans at the last minute to diffuse the feud rumours between the Duchesses. I can imagine the Duchess of Cambridge was pretty fucked off with that one; not only was it Prince Louis’s first Christmas, but it was also that of Pippa’s new baby, Arthur– the Middletons were clearly looking forward to spending Christmas together, and at the last minute, their plans were shattered, thanks to Meghan– providing another reason for Kate to staple Meghan’s face to her dart board in the royal drawing room at Kensington Palace.

So to summarise, what do I think is the real story? Well, I do think most of what has hit the headlines has been the truth.
I do believe William warned Harry off Meghan in the first instance; on Kate and William’s wedding day in 2011, during their carriage procession from the Abbey to Buckingham Palace, one royal commentator described William as “astute” and said that he had “always spotted people a mile off who were approaching him and wanting to be his friend for all the wrong reasons”– and I think that definitely applies here.

William definitely saw Meghan for what she likely is: fame-hungry, desperate for attention and arrives with an agenda tucked under her arm. Harry, having finally found a woman who jumped at the chance of wearing a tiara, likely crapped all over his big brother’s opinion because he didn’t want to believe what he was saying (“let me make my own mistakes, yah?”) and proceeded to marry Meghan anyway, resulting in radio silence from the Cambridges. No longer does Harry refer to his nephews and niece in the same affectionate way he used to: in fact, he never discusses them at all now, has never even made reference to Louis’s existence and looked like he had a rod firmly up his arse during Louis’s christening last summer, which appears to be his default expression these days.

You could almost feel sorry for Harry; he had a long string of girlfriends who dated him for a bit and then realised they didn’t want to be a Princess, which must have been crushing to him. He was in his early 30s, desperate for a family, and wasn’t prepared to wait around for much longer. Why wouldn’t he be annoyed at his brother breezing through with a reality check and destroying his illusion of a wife and kids? But sadly, this is the one person in the universe he’d have done well to listen to. As the future King, William has likely dealt with his fair share of wannabe Princesses and fake friends– he had the best tools out of anyone to advise Harry clearly for the path ahead, especially without mum Diana in the picture to do so– but what do you do when the person you’re trying to help doesn’t want to listen to reason?

Do I think it’s weird that William still served as Best Man at Harry’s wedding? No, I don’t. At the end of the day, they are still brothers and I still think things were on a fairly even keel even up until just before the wedding, so there was no reason for Wills to refuse.
I have a younger brother too, and while I may not always approve of his dating choices, I wouldn’t avoid his wedding if he married somebody I did not think was right for him. He is still my brother and I would still be there to support him– even if I didn’t agree with him. It’s what siblings do.

I suspect, in part, the fall-out between the brothers is due to William being hurt by his brother’s ignorance and blatant disregard for his advice, as well as Harry probably realising by now that William may have actually been right about Meghan, but is too stubborn to swallow his pride and admit it. At this point, or in the near future, the Cambridges should probably be rolling their eyes at Harry and telling him “we told you so”– but the inevitable fall-out of the Sussex marriage and the hurricane that will follow — will no doubt speak for itself.